Posts Tagged ‘Passion’

Jealousy and Envy on Facebook

Friday, April 8th, 2011

By Nomalanga Mhlauli-Moses

Recently I caught a bit of the Gayle King Show and she shared a few interesting survey results. Apparently the most annoying thing to Facebook users is people who get on Facebook and complain-no surprise there; who doesn’t want to flee from Negative Nellies and Debbie Downers? What I thought was very interesting though was that apparently Facebook users are also annoyed by people who talk too much about their “seemingly perfect lives”-really?

Let’s get really honest, today…The last time that you heard another person talking about something really, really great happening in their life, how did you feel? What about if what was going great in their lives was the exact thing that you were experiencing depressing levels of failure in?

I’ll start; I felt awful! In fact, I felt like waiting for them in dark alley and them beating that smug grin off of their face! I’ll also say this; that was a very long time ago. Nowadays, other people’s good or great news makes me giggle with glee. I tend to experience other people’s victories as if they were mine.

The reason why I can celebrate other people’s victories with them is that I am confident that I am living a life of abundance and I believe that all of us can. When you live a life of abundance, you realize that other people’s successes and victories take absolutely nothing from you. I look at other people’s success as proof of what is possible for all of us. I have had times in my life when my circumstances were so full of despair that I just couldn’t imagine that they would change and my saving grace was hearing other people talk about how their lives were great even though they had, at some point, been beaten down by their circumstances.

So, if you’re one of those people who feels annoyed when you hear about someone’s “seemingly perfect life” you may have to consider that what you’re calling annoyance may just be the green eyed twins, jealousy and envy. You know who they are; Jealousy is the one who says “my insecurity leads me to believe that I may lose you if…” and envy is the twin that says “I want what you have but I’d rather be angry at you for having it than focus on getting my own…” The cure, my friends, is simple; decide what you want out of life and go for it! Once you get on this path, there is no room for the green eyed twins. You’ll be so busy working on building your dreams that there won’t be any room for them!

Selah

President Barack Obama’s Biggest Error and Michelle Obama’s Greatest Victory

Thursday, March 17th, 2011

Recently while giving a lecture on Leadership, I used The President as an example of one critical error that many leaders make. This error is usually made as a result of ‘chronic people pleasing’ and while it may seem noble, it is still a very critical error.

The error is quite simply leading without a clear Definite Purpose.

Some years ago, I read the book “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill and my main take away was the understanding of the importance of Definiteness of Purpose. This is what I am suggesting is lacking in the current presidency.

Since President Obama assumed office, he has tackled many, many issues including “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, Race Relations (remember the Black Harvard Professor, Dr. Henry Gates and the Caucasian Boston police officer?), The War in Iraq (Or is it Afghanistan?), Unemployment and a devastating Economic crisis. The list goes on and on and on!

Before I go any further, let me be clear; I have a lot of respect, admiration and even Love for President Obama and my intention is not to start a campaign on why he should not be President or how lousy of a job he is doing as President. As a college instructor and a life strategist, I teach leadership and personal development courses and programs so I am able to recognize basic leadership errors and my intention is to point out one very common and critical error that many leaders (even President Obama) make.

Lacking Definiteness of Purpose is the reason why many leaders fail. Having a definite purpose is the anchor of every accomplishment by a person, company, institution or even an administration. Former President George W Bush was on Oprah sometime last year and while I do not agree with most of the policies that he enacted while he was in office, I can honestly say about him that he was clear about his purpose; War on Terror! He tackled many issues, as of course any President would, but he remained clear about his purpose; Get the Terrorists! His policies, agree with them or not, were aligned with the purpose that he was clear about from the beginning; Get the Terrorists!

So, what is President Obama’s purpose, as a President? No one really knows… Yes, he has made history by becoming the first Black President and even then, some argue that he is not “black enough’. That being said, I believe that President Obama does not have a definite purpose. After he leaves office, what will his legacy be, other than that he was Black? What is the one thing that we will remember him for?

Success is quite simply accomplishing what you set out to do. Former President George Bush had a definite purpose and he accomplished it. Again, agree or disagree with him, but he was successful. (Remember Saddam Hussein?)

Another great example of a success story is Michelle Obama. As First Lady, she has had one main goal and that is to start a process that will eliminate childhood obesity. This is her DEFINATE PURPOSE and we all know about it. When I watch children’s television shows with my babies, I often see her on the kids’ channels encouraging the children to be more active. Again, this is part of her “Let’s Move” campaign which she is using to start the process to eliminate childhood obesity. She encourages us to prepare and eat healthier meals and she has led the way by planting fresh vegetables in the White House garden. There are many other actions that she has taken and I won’t go on with the list but the point is that her purpose is clear and her actions are in alignment with her purpose as First Lady and this is her victory!

So, what’s the lesson? The lesson is simple, if you want to be successful, approach your goal with definiteness of purpose. Be deliberate about thinking thoughts, speaking words and taking actions that align with whatever that purpose is. If you do this, you will be successful; you will accomplish your goal! As for President Obama, let’s continue to pray for him as he leads the country and hopefully, before his term is over, he will leave a Legacy that we (and he) can be proud of.
Peace

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