Kevin Hart’s message to “Strong Black Women”

Funny man, Kevin Hart, has allegedly  taken to cartoon illustrations to get his message across to black women about their attitudes. In the cartoon, he shows a group of black women rejecting a black man’s friendly greeting and then goes on to show the same black man walking with a white woman. The funny part is that the same black women who rejected him are then angry to see him with the white woman. The following words are written at the top of the cartoon: Being a “strong black woman” does not mean have an attitude.

What is interesting about this cartoon is that even though Kevin hart is being funny, there is an element of truth in his joke. I have often heard the angry ramblings of black women when they see a black man who has chosen to date or marry a non-black woman. He is often accused of hating himself or hating black woman or some variation of a negative opinion of his choice of partner. Of course, not all black women are angry or even care when they see black men with women of other races but it can’t be said that Kevin Hart is entirely wrong for pointing it out.

What Kevin Hart’s cartoon did fail to illustrate, however, is that there are black men who have such a deep seeded loathing for black women that they will date anyone except a black woman! Most of these men do not date non-black women necessarily because they have been rejected by black women, but instead because they have taken the worst stereotype of black women and draped it all over ALL black women.

At the end of the day, we can keep accusing each other of “selling out” or suffering from self loathing but the numbers still speak louder than any of us can. There are too many broken homes in the black community and a lot of our children are not being raised in happy, healthy and functional two parent homes. An open dialogue needs to take place about how we can begin to bring those statistics down and maybe people like Kevin Hart, although doing it through humor, are doing their part in opening the doors to the dialogue that needs to take place.

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20 Responses to “Kevin Hart’s message to “Strong Black Women””

  1. […] seeded loathing for black women that they will date anyone except a black woman! Read the rest at Subscribe to this author’s posts feed via RSS About nomalangaNomalanga is a professional […]

  2. Ixon1 says:

    I love black women. Period. And I feel that they are only to be with black men. The problem that I see is that so a lot of women (1) disqualify men even before they even say anything to them. (2)Tend to believe that acting aggressively is what they perceive as strength. But there are more good examples than bad. (A) I should not have to fight with her at every turn because she expects things to turn out her way. (B) I should not have to be challenged and criticized for being who I am. And just because she is doing better financially does not discount my value as a black man nor does it warrant her treating me with disrespect or disregard. (C) Just because a man say something as simple as “Hello” does not mean that the intention is to jump into bed with them. Even though it is healthy to be attracted to her if she is beautiful and desirable. (D) So many tend to want to be with bad boys or supposedly “Broken” boys that they will absolutely overlook decent men for clowns & buffoons. That has been my experience with sisters but I will not give up on them!!

    • Dee says:

      To: lxon1.. Be encouraged and never give up, there are some good black women out there who are desiring to meet a black man who has the desire to be in a monogamous, committed relationship that hopefully will lead to more….. Hopefully by now you have met your queen, be blessed.


  3. Fayiza says:

    I don’t know who all these rude Black women with attitudes R portrayed in the media, especially by Black men? It’s practically become a stereotype for the Black woman, “Black women have attitudes” . Of course some do but it’s seems a sweeping accusation that Black women have issues. I’m sure White men complain about women(many who have attitudes including the show me the $ attitude) in their circle of male friends when talking about “chicks”. They don’t abandon dating White women though as many Black men do while thinking the grass is greener on the white side.
    There R many eye rolling, neck poppin’, finger wavin, Black “chicks” with attitudes but they DO NOT define Black Women! Further more this issue is way bigger than Black men & Black women vs White women. There’s some deep rooted stuff going on here going back 400+ years that need be honestly talked about & understood.

    • Fayiza-What are some of the issues of the “deep rooted stuff”?

      • Fayiza says:

        Nomalanga, to this day we subconsciously suffer the consequences of the slavery experience, ala Dr. Joy Degruy’s “Post Tramatic Slavery Disorder”, whether we r aware or not. It rears it head in Black culture in many ways. It’s the reason so many Black women post Black Power, Black is beautiful era, ever increasingly flaunt long silky artificial(or human) hair(can I say lace front). I’m NOT against weaves per say but the evidence of so much ridiculous sporting of long straight hair by a any means nor matter how awful it looks is an issue. If I see one more awful doll hair weave on a sista I know would look so much more beautiful with a natural hair style or at least more natural looking weave, I feel I’ll just snatch it off her head-LOL I jest, yet still serious. This IS believe it or not, a symptom of what I see as some type of psycho-spiritual disorder not just hair style preference. It’s akin to putting that shirt on yr head as a little girl pretending it’s yr long hair(maybe yr to young to ’bout that or maybe not), remember the Whoopi Goldgerg skit. Historically Black/African ppl have had glorious hairstyles that had nothing to do with changing our hair texture. Then post slavery our hair is a problem & has to be straightened(now where did we get the notion of straight hair being better ie “girl u betta get u a perm & bust dem napps” or “u got good hair”). The “good hair” referred to never looks like my fine textured cottony , or course “nappy/kinky” hair, it means either wavy or close to straight.
        Next of course is the skin complexion, dark/light skin thing. From Africa to Jamaica to US or where ever, skin bleaching is a major practice even to the risk of severe health problems. In 2012 we’re still dealing with the “paper bag test” in certain circles, quite as it’s kept.
        Yes Sista, this is not just simply Black men prefer blondes syndrome. It is quite deep rooted and far reaching, too much to go into in this limited forum at this time.

  4. Carmen Jones says:

    Here we go again! We hear about the much lauded “strong” or “angry” black woman as often as we hear about another celebrtiy break up and to be quite frank, I’m a little confused. Is this attitude or unattractive behavior so many of us are accused of actually happening in epidemic proportions OR is it a matter of perception?

    Someone forwarded this link earlier today and while I was initally against even seeing the moving “Think Like A Man”, I just stepped in a few moments ago from having seen it. It was a really good movie, chopping up issues we face when dating and added a comedic twist to those same issues with a definite message.

    For the benefit of those who may mot have seen it yet, I won’t give up the goods but will say some of the parts depicted of this “strong” woman may exist. Has anyone ever stopped to think about WHY so many women feel as if they need to have balls made of titanium? As someone alluded to above, years and years of doing things on their own is one reason and many more. Again, my point being is why are so many acting this way?

    As for black men dating other nationalities? Well… That would take car too much to break that down but newsflash – who cares? They have been doing this for many yeats and whether it is their idea of what is beautiful, what shows status, what looks exotic, what “accept” them or any other rationale, black women need to get over it. But here’s a public service announcement to any who do it – no need to down US so badly. You may not want balck women- okay, we get that but go easy on the negative connotations. Your hateful and hurtful words surely do not make us desireable to the next man, and certainl not one of another nationality!

  5. Kitty says:

    I agree with Fayiza especially her last sentence.
    A lot of the issues between Black men and Black women I believe stem from slavery and because they are so deep rooted is the reason we are still to this day having so many problem between us.

    Today we are “still having the discussion about light skinned vs dark skinned, straight hair vs natural.” (just two examples what one perceives as being beautiful or desireable)

    Self hatred and being made to feel inferior are part of this dynamic also.

    The separation of families during slavery and Black fathers not in the home today while many are being incarcerated. One reason why many Black women have to be strong and independant because they have a child or children that have to be taken care of. It is not always by choice, they do it for their families, there is no man in the home to be the head of the household.

  6. Fayiza says:

    Wow! Noma I replied to yr ? having never looked at yr picture. I just did and please don’t be offended by what I’ve said above but I stand by it, for you R a classic example of what I mean. You R a strikingly beautiful Sister, who in yr profile picture is wearing just the straight shiny hair I’m talking about. Now where what U wan, but realize the roots of why U THINK you’ve merely made a hairstyle choice.

  7. Whad Dafuqewesay says:

    I’ll date a black woman when I find one that don’t have a baby daddy.

  8. Whad Dafuqewesay says:

    Ok here’s the story,: Fell in love with a woman, who had a kid. Everything was fine until one day, which just happen to be the worst day of my life. It just seems that nothing could go right that day. I came home and found her son who was 15 doing something that I did not approve of, When I told him to stop he said you’re not my daddy you can’t tell me what to do. There was no come to Jesus moment I’m not a violant or angry person so I said nothing and just walked away. But the seed was planted and the kid was right I’m not his father and I could not tell him what to do. His mother was in school, and I was the sole support for the family, we had been having some problems but nothing that could not be worked out. However that day was the icing on the cake. This was my house and my life but I let them invade it. Needless to say, There gone, so now I’m happy with a white woman, and we have a beautiful 3 year old daughter end of story, So my sisters be careful what you bring to the table. by the way the kid ended up doing 5 serve 2 for auto theft. Well I guess he was right I’m not his daddy.

  9. burplesixtoe says:

    I got a name for fat, stupid ugly bootlip women with an attitude, slow walking down the middle of the sidewalk talking on their government provided ear buds. I call them “Obeshia.”

  10. Abhay says:

    Right onih-ts helped me sort things right out.

  11. Daisy says:

    The only reason Kevin made this clip was to justify him marrying a non-balck woman. Period!!!

  12. Elizabeth says:

    I’m a black woman who loves black men but they seem to look me over for half naked 20 year olds or women of a different race so I gave up.

  13. Nell says:

    Who cares what Kevin Hart has to say. Being a modern day minstrel does not make him an authority on anything other than his craft.

  14. Regina says:

    I prefer a geek or a blue collar black man. I’ve dated both and they do take care of their business.

    Keven is trying to justify his actions by trying to take the heat off himself.

  15. NP says:

    His deplection of the black one is one sided. So dont invest too much time and thought into what he is showing.  He cheated on his black woman and now  has to retaliate because of his own wrongdoing. keep in mind that there is a war and it has always been the black family!  They killed them then and centuries later they are killing them now. In plan sight, without reason or “just cause”. It looks like it’s “just cause they are black”! At some point they will have to learn what is best for them and it is us when they can’t make ends meet we take on the role and make it happen for our family! But if we don’t want to accept BS we’re labeled as angry or aggressive or uncompromising.  This is not how we started out.  this is how we have ended up being because we have had to play both roles.  Until we stop blaming one or the other the target on their backs will continue!  think about it watch the shows that are on TV now there is still an attack on black! But they know, they have the black man they arent the problem anymore, hell they have the right to shoot or choke a black man and now boy in the street and  WILL get away with it!!!!
    So who is the real problem now? The last hold out? It’s the black woman!  Now the
     attack is on the black woman,  we are holding the last line of defense still wanting, desiring, praising the black man.  What did David Chappel say? The Black man has to wear a dress to be accepted or considered funny! And any type of fame immediately has the black man believing he has to distance himself from his upbringing in order to be accepted?  So now that we’ve gotten the Blackman until control, let’s go for the last hold out”the black woman”  Black women are being attacked and belittle by black men so much whites dont have to do it and now the tv shows are showing us as successful women but our desire should be for the white man to be accepted!!
     Wake up!!!!!! What has Mariah Carey Tiger Woods and Hallie berry said at one point or another in their career? they said that you can not label them as ” black” so the mix kids that you are creating will one day make sure the mix does not include you!  and you’ll look up black man to see that the only thing black at your dinner table is you and that is what we call checkmate!!!!

    • MyBlackIsBeautiful says:

      As a black woman it saddens me to see how well we have all been tricked into hating each other. I fell in love with was engaged to and had babies by a black man who treated me awful (to say the least). It has been suggested that I choose a man from a different race but I don’t condone giving up on my black men just because of one very bad relationship with one black man. If more black men and women could adopt this attitude with a flat out refusal to turn on one another we would be much better off as a people. I agree and know that our wounds run very deep and have plagued us for decades. It is our responsibility to stop pointing the finger and placing the blame. This will take much persistence and strength But it is very possible to overcome. Black men need to love and respect and have understanding for your black women and visa versa, we were created for one another. We should defy the odds and stick together. I have to believe that somewhere in this world is the right man for me, a man who will cherish and respect me, be a provider and positive contribution to my life, (as I will for him) and he is a black man.

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